“Grief is one of the heart’s natural responses to loss. When we grieve, we allow ourselves to feel the truth of our pain, the measure of betrayal or tragedy in our life. By our willingness to mourn, we slowly acknowledge, integrate, and accept the truth of our losses. Sometimes the best way to let go is to grieve. It takes courage to grieve, to honor the pain we carry. We can grieve in tears or in meditative silence, in prayer or in song. In touching the pain of recent and long-held griefs, we come face to face with our genuine human vulnerability, with helplessness and hopelessness. These are the storm clouds of the heart.” Jack Kornfield
Grief can be deeply emotional and overwhelming, manifesting in various forms. It might stem from the loss of a loved one or even someone we barely knew but whose death was reported by the media or a friend. This loss could be recent, expected, unexpected, or even resurface from the past.
Meditation offers a few moments of quiet and stillness to honor the feelings that accompany loss. It helps our mind and body reset, reducing physical responses related to anxiety and emotions.
This meditation focuses on navigating grief, a unique process for each individual that can take many paths and resurface unexpectedly. Find a comfortable place to sit upright where you won’t be disturbed for 10 to 15 minutes (or however long you need). Close your eyes when you feel comfortable.
- Begin to breathe slowly and deeply, bring your focus to your breath.
- This is not to control your breath, but to simple observe the air being inhaled and exhaled.
- Begin to move focus into your physical body, allow your shoulders to drop and relaxation to wash over your body. Invite relaxation into your muscles and move your focus from head to toe to let go of tension and soften your body.
- Bring your attention to your mind and ask for your thoughts to settle and clear, continue to use your breath to exhale tension and thought. Thoughts may continue to enter, so not try to control this, just acknowledge them and bring your focus back to breath and relaxation.
- Move your attention to how you are feeling, emotionally and physically. Try not to analyze what you are feeling, just be in the moment. Acknowledge your emotions in a gentle and loving way.
- There is a tie that binds us all as human beings experiencing loss and moving though grief. There is a timeless wisdom that exists in the human spirit that allows us each to be with our grief when we allow it. As you breathe ask not to deny the feelings, whatever they are, pain and tears, anger and love, fear and sorrow. Know these will come, but they will also go. Perhaps not for always, but for moments that will sometimes carry on for long periods and will sometimes be fleeting. Make space for yourself to experience feelings of loss, recent and past. Let the feelings come layer by layer. A little at a time and be with them for however long you choose. Keep breathing softly and compassionately.
- Breathe in tenderness and exhale kindness for all who have experienced loss. The grief we carry is part of the grief of the world. For this we need to hold ourselves gently, honour our feelings then begin to let them go. Not because we have forgotten or because we care any less, but because we are meant to continue to live and learn and move into the next parts of our lives. Take a moment to see the value of our vulnerability and the fragility that is life. Grief follows a natural process our mind, body and heart can move through when we trust, reach out and treat ourselves gently.
- When you are ready bring your focus back to your breath. Scan your body for tension and focus on breathing into relaxation. Appreciate yourself for taking the time to be with this process and then slowly stretch and bring yourself back to awareness.
Along with meditation, the process of accepting loss can be written, channeled through art and music and other paths that are healing and supportive. It is important to share with others and to seek help when grief is making it difficult to return to everyday living.